Monthly Archives: August 2013

Not a Ghost of a Chance

Okay, most of the details have been lost to the fog that is my horrifically bad memory, but this story takes place Once Upon a Time in Johto…

I believe the trainer’s name was Clair, who set out from Professor Elm’s lab with a Chikorita she called Athelas.  The reason that I think it was Clair is because Katelyn of Unova currently has Athelas in her PC.

By the way, I take full responsibility for the brainfart that is her name.  No, I was not thinking about the fact that she was going to face a self-important Dragon Tamer by that exact same name.  Some days I am an idiot.

So Clair, my Trainer, was in Ecruteak preparing to face Morty and his Gym full of Poltergeist-wielding Mediums.

As an aside, that is a fuq-ed up situation if I ever saw one.  Twenty something male leading a gym exclusively populated by women old enough to be his grandmother, if not older still… and all of them with Ghosts of the Gastly line?  Yeeeaaaahhhh… like that doesn’t get your red flags popping up everywhere…

Anyway, Clair had a very well prepared team for facing Gastlys and Haunters and Gengar.  She had a Togetic with Extrasensory, Athelas with Magical Leaf… five very well prepared Pokemon.

In this case, the Sixth Man was the result of a favor that Clair was doing for Bill, who designed the PC Box system in Johto.  He’d gotten an Eevee that he wasn’t able to adequately raise and Clair had taken a shine to the level 5 sweetheart that she called “Baby”.

The first person to make a snide comment about women and beady-eyed fuzzies will get something very hard and uncomfortable shoved someplace even more uncomfortable at an incredibly high velocity.

Clair wasn’t actively training Baby; she was focusing on building their relationship before she did any actual training.  In the meantime Baby had gone sniffing through Clair’s bag of toys and had found a bell that he’d taken a shine to.  So she had him following along at the back of the group watching battles and playing with his bell.

Clair made her way through the Mediums, rolling her eyes at the way they always killed the lights when they were defeated.  It was annoying, but not impossibly so.

Morty, though… Morty apparently had an exaggerated sense of his own historical importance. Clair, at that point, really didn’t care about being any sort of important figure.  Catching Legendary Pokemon was not something that she was obsessed about, no matter that Suicune did pause and look at her measuringly.  So to say that she really wasn’t impressed by him was putting the matter mildly.

As I recall, Morty had a couple Haunters and a Gengar.  The battle proceeded more or less according to plan… until Morty’s final Pokemon, a Haunter.

Yeah, it wasn’t even the damn Gengar, it was one of the Haunters.

That was when things started to unravel badly.  I don’t remember any more just how I ended up losing every one of Clair’s fighters… but damn if it didn’t happen.  They managed to get the Haunter to below half in the process, but ultimately Clair was left with only Baby… and no Revives in her bag.

This was where Clair’s own pride reared its head.  Yeah, she was left with only a level 5 Eevee with NO non-Normal moves.  But she was gonna be damned if she wasn’t going to see the battle to the bitter end.  For his part, Baby was going to do his best, no matter what his Trainer asked him to do.

So here’s this incredibly low level Eevee versus a Haunter with less than half his health left.  Normal can’t hit Ghosts… Ghosts can’t hit Normal… and that is when the Haunter uses the only move that he’s got which can even remotely threaten Baby and end the standoff.


Clair sees the Haunter start the move and her heart just freakin’ sinks.  She’s gonna see this, through, though, to the damned bitter end.  There’s a detail, though, that Clair wasn’t considering.  Curse cuts the using Pokemon’s health before it sets the damage over time, and it doesn’t cut a percentage of current health, it cuts half of maximum health.

The Haunter literally passed itself out laughing at Baby.  But damn, if Baby wasn’t left standing at the end, and ohhhh the exp reward.  The only thing that woulda been better would be if Baby had then evolved into Umbreon or Espeon as a result, but the relationship wasn’t quite that strong enough yet.

I still wish it could’ve happened, though… ’cause it woulda been badass as hell.  Baby didn’t have a Ghost of a chance of winning… and he still managed it.  How cool is that?

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Saved by the Sixth Man

I recently reset my copy of Pokemon Black so that I could play through the story again and I’m having a pretty good time with it… though sometimes things don’t end up the way I expected them to.  I always seem to have a story going on in the back of my head, though, so that leads to some interesting interpretations of events.

In my teams, the sixth man is always a Pickup artist.  Sometimes the fifth is too, but always the sixth.  Their whole purpose is to carry HM moves for transportation and such and find random items along the way.  They usually don’t battle unless it’s to gather more items through the use of Covet.  Because of this, lately they’re usually Linoone traded in at far too high a level for the Trainer to efficiently use.  After all, higher level = better finds.

So I go in to Clay’s Gym in Driftveil and I’m feeling like crap.  My meds have me sick as the proverbial Growlithe with my head spinning so bad that I feel like my Dreamcatcher Munna’s been pranking me with Confusion.  I make it through the warm up Trainers just fine and then I face Clay.

I have a well-trained Leavanny, an even better trained Dewott, and my Herdier has Rock Smash… this should be a freakin’ cakewalk.

… but damn, how’d those cakes start walking themselves all over me?

The only thing worse than a Pokemon being confused is the Trainer.  I don’t actually know when I lost positive control of the situation, but his Excadrill did a hell of a job on me.  Next thing I know I was down by three Pokemon (the Dewott, the Herdier, and my Archen) and Ceddie, my Leavanny, was holding on by the very nails on his pincers.

But I won.  Damnit, all that and my Pokemon still pulled through for me.  I love these games.

So I stumble back outside and… make a wrong turn on the way to the Center.  Yes, I’m leading a ravaged team in dire need of healing and I get ambushed by Bianca.

I don’t begrudge the girl a fair fight… she could seriously use the self confidence, but this is ridiculous.  I’m left with a nearly collapsed Leavanny (who finishes the process fairly quickly into the battle.  Arceus bless you, Ceddie, you’re a loyal friend), my Excadrill, and the Sixth Man, Hoodlum, the Linoone.

Hoodlum saved my butt today.  Thank Arceus I had that shiny new Badge, though.  I wonder where I can find some Poke Treats… my team deserves them.

… now to get Archea her wings…

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